I thought I’d write a bit about what our dynamic looks like for anyone who might be following and might not have the whole picture. Likely, no one has the whole picture …. I really don’t write much about our daily interactions because I guess I just take them as a given. It has been brought to my attention recently, or more over to the forefront, that not everyone acts and reacts the way we do. Of course I know that but when you start typing about what you think and what you are doing it is easy sometimes to forget that no one else knows the rest of the story. In order for any of this to be put in perspective I should give you a little history and a few details.
Hummm, I should probably check with Sir to see if he minds if some of the posts are done in this manner! brb 🙂
So some of the things that happen daily around here are
that we share (yes share) the responsibility of the home and kids and finances (although I have stepped back quite a bit on that front) but I do the normal 50’s house wife duties we’ll say myself and remind Sir of what needs to be done in due time. By this I mean, anniversaries, kids birthdays, His mom and dad’s birthdays (lol), making plans for the holidays … and then basically giving Him a list of what needs to be done and letting Him either take care of it or sign off on it.
I am the vice president of this family, anything that I can handle and have the authority to handle I will without bothering the BOSS and then anything that might be in question or I could use a hand with or is just simply that important goes directly to Sir. Not that big of a deal I don’t think and not that far off from how I suppose most efficient relationships run …
It wasn’t always this way, I had no problem making it this way but Sir was more then happy to let me carry on as VP we’ll say, for a while but then He became a silent partner. That would be where our issues began.
It didn’t happen right away, with busy work lives and kids schedules and timing being off, the balance started to shift slowly but surely …. eventually I started to feel like the weight of the world was on my shoulders and very alone in all of it.
The more threatened I felt (by that I mean not having a safety net), the more I needed to control and the more I took over. Eventually I guess Sir felt redundant and I felt neglected. It wasn’t on purpose and it wasn’t a lack of respect, or care or want …. it was just time and a busy life.
Now we make it a point of checking in, and now I know He wants to hear from me and He wants to help or decide for me so that sometimes I just don’t have to carry the weight of the world. I not only have a partner but I have a place to turn to and I have a soft place to fall when I just don’t feel like I can go any further …
I have back up …..
So anyway, some of my future posts may start off with ‘so I read some where’ or ‘someone said to me’ or ‘made me think of’ …. and then I will write where my idea came from or what set me off ! 🙂 Or some might be, this happened the other day and my brain carried me to, what if ….
Love You Sir ❤