Words of Wisdom – D/s included

I think for any relationship to be fulfilling the emotional investment needs to be the same from both sides. I don’t think it matters what type of relationship or what type of dynamic. The truth of the human condition is that if you don’t feel the investment is the same you will be unhappy, period!

This may manifest itself in different ways in your life. You might think your relationship, whatever type it is, is working but you will be unhappy just in general! You will be grumpy, judgmental or just simply always looking for fault or issues with other people and other situations. Nothing ever seems quite right or good enough, all because at your core you are unhappy.

I don’t believe that happy, fulfilled people are rude or hurtful or angry all the time. I just don’t think you have it in you to be nasty in anyway when you are truly happy and fulfilled in your life.

I’ve recently cut out a couple people who were just like that, always angry about something, always finding fault in any situation and always basically b*tching about something …. everything. There was/is obviously something missing in their lives that makes them have to bring others down in order to feel good about themselves. Obviously it’s not working ….

I don’t know if it’s spouse, work, family or friends but they obviously have relationships in their lives that are leaving them less then fulfilled and therefor lashing out in all other areas as a result. Perhaps it’s simply because they themselves are not putting the investment into their own lives. Perhaps they are disillusioned in themselves …. some people simply don’t want to be happy.

That is a whole other post on an entirely different blog!

Love You Sir ❤


Just a normal life ….

Not sure what to write today, feeling pretty good mentally. Still fighting off whatever it is that has me down but getting much better and easier to manage. Anytime it wants to be gone for good would be wonderful!

The sun is shining and the birds are singing and I can’t say anything is amiss at the moment. Life is good ….

I’ve been getting back into some exercise through the day and adding squats to the mix to build up my leg muscles! 😉 And for hopefully running too!

The oldest turns 16 today! Hard to believe it some times, before you know it he will be off to university and a whole new set of worries and excitement will be at our door. It still fills me with wonder and gratitude when I think about you, me and our life together. More then I could have ever wanted, truly!

I guess that’s about all …. Happy 16th Birthday Young Man!

Love You Always Sir ❤


Rules and Rituals overload ….

No not for me or my relationship but I have been giving some thought to the way some people in TTWD are trying to/or have organized their daily lives, and how I think I would feel about it.

I see a D/s relationship in much the same light as any other relationship that we human beings share. Anything over time tends to becomes second nature, usual, less exciting and dare I say it …. sometimes boring?

Most of us, especially those of us who started down this journey as an after thought to our relationship or marriage were looking to spice things up, make it fresh and new again, add some excitement. Maybe we wanted to change the balance of our dynamic for one reason or another we felt that dominant/submissive in our relationship was what we wanted and how we wanted to feel.

Most often I hear of submisives wanting rules and lists and rituals to feel the dominant presence and to know the dynamic is intact and working. That’s fair enough, and it works for a while …. but then the nervous excitement wains. You are left with a bunch of rules and rituals that might start to feel basic and unnecessary or over the top and more of a burden then a grateful act done in love and respect. I guess this is what they mean when they say ‘our D/s is on the back burner’ or ‘life has gotten in the way’.

I think keeping the core rules and rituals simple and meaningful is the key. By doing things that actually mean something to you and your dominant the feeling of ‘right’ is always with you. By keeping things simple it allows for your D/s to exist no matter what life throws at you and for many windows of opportunity for new and exciting things to happen and to keep you on your toes!

In my own life for example I have a few set expectations and rules that I follow, that Sir has decided are important and needed for us both to be where we are most comfortable. There are not many but they all mean something important and any one of them would signal a big problem if for whatever reason they were not done. These things don’t ever go ‘on the back burner’ or ‘on hold until we can start our D/s again’.

By only having the important things set out as rules however it does leave a lot of room for changes and surprises to happen through the days and weeks and more importantly over time ….. things don’t get to feel like the same ole same ole because I never quite know what’s going to happen next! We have our limits that were discussed and agreed to so basically everything within that play ground could be called upon at any time! Talk about always on the edge of your seat ….!  lol 😀

I realize that some people prefer to have things set out and ritualized and scheduled from morning to night. Some people are very comfortable knowing exactly what is going to happen next and how, now and forever amen. There is nothing wrong with that and I think if it makes you happy then by all means do it!

For me however, I am easily bored with the same thing over and over. My mind normally works on a subject until I ‘solve it’ and then I’m ready for the next puzzle, the next new learning experience. I dissect the actions of everyday life and figure out what it is that makes it important or worthy of being done. Doing the same thing day in and day out just because is simply not for me. I need more meaning then that, I find comfort in growing and expanding my horizons not in familiar rituals. (Unless like I said earlier they are important to your core being.) I want to be surprised, I want to be off balance and I want to be nervously excited about what my dominant might ask for next …. I don’t want to know in advance. I want to forever keep it fresh ….

As long as the dominant keeps doing something or asking for something that keeps the power exchange on the forefront of your mind then this method keeps things exciting and new. Everything is within the agreed upon limits of course but not knowing exactly what or when He might want something from me next keeps me both mindful when it happens and excited to see what’s next.

Just my thoughts on what it looks like 10 years in ….. or 20 years. We all started off excited and into each other when we got married and then things eventually started to be the same everyday. What happened next? There is no reason to believe this dynamic is immune to human nature. So I like it this way, always an element of surprise and never exactly what I was expecting …. fresh! 🙂

It is called a dynamic after all – not a static! LOL

Love You Sir Always ❤




Wishful thinking?

I’ve been thinking more and more recently about getting back into some running. Now I was never a marathon runner or anything like that, truth be told I had just gotten into the idea of running and really started enjoying it before I had to abruptly stop doing it!

I had finally stopped smoking and was ready to start looking at other ways to stay active, healthy and give me my much needed release/relaxation time that my mind needed without interruption. Running seemed like a perfect way to accomplish both and I must admit I was really starting to enjoy the time! It was like yoga without the religious aspects that some instructors throw at you …. I wanted to be centered, not dwell on religious beliefs at that particular time!

Anyway, flash forward and menoBeast steps in! It got to the point that I couldn’t run for very long before leaking! Oh yeah, isn’t that calming and relaxing when you need to worry with every step that it is going to start, and once it does there is no stopping it except to stop running. Enter embarrassment and frustration and hanging up of the proverbial towel!

Well it’s been about 2 years since I have bothered to try again and I was thinking maybe I should give it another try. The issue seems to have resolved it self in other aspects of life (sneezing, dancing etc.) so perhaps it would be safe to try again here too? Obviously you don’t just start running all out from ‘cold turkey’ quitting so the slow buildup and tolerance training might work? Anyone out there have any suggestions or information on this one? I’d love to get a heads up ….

These pants are NOT made for diapers!  😛 

I don’t want to rely on just impact play to be able to de-stress, I don’t think that’s a very wise or healthy way of being. Something that can be done at anytime without much equipment or preparation I think is a wise option for a busy, working mother of two with a Sir at home! 😉 The health benefits are certainly there both physically and mentally for me … now I just need to figure out how to go about it without the wet walk of shame back home! 😛

Love You Sir ❤


Wonderful weekend, asking for more please?

It was a wonderful fun filled weekend Sir, thank you! Got some gardening done and that always makes me feel good! (And getting up and off the couch works wonders too!)

I had a lot of fun being your play toy too! 😉 I am hoping for some much needed stress relief and I think you could probably use some too?

It’s been a while and I am starting to feel a bit ‘tightly wound’. Hopefully the timing works out soon …. it always makes me feel so much calmer and in some ways very much owned.

Physically I think I am well enough to play, I didn’t have any issues with the bit of play we did on the weekend so I think I am ready.

I can tell you’re feeling much better too, you were much more in control and on the ball with everything! It was A LOT of fun being cheeky with you …. hehehe. More please …. 😀 Can’t wait til you’re home.

Love You Lots Sir ❤

Newton’s Third Law

The physics of a D/s relationship also applies ….

For every (submissive) action there is an equal and opposite (dominant) reaction … the two forces must coexist in order for the energy to be maintained.

In addition, someone must start the action or no reaction will be forthcoming to balance the equation …..

In a nut shell, it takes two! If one side does not act the other must or no energy will exist. Simple as that ….

(Being very scientifically liberal here! LOL but you get the picture.)

So we have gone through a bit of a lull in the past few weeks (month) with life and illness and lack of time or energy. I think we have been ‘at rest’ long enough ….   I for one am ready to get playful and cheeky and see what you do about it Sir! LOL

I’m not quite at 100% but getting better everyday and everyone knows that your mental state has to do with your physical state in one way or another. I was starting to feel the ‘funk’ crawling back over my head, not sure if it was chemical changes or just from being down and out with illness but either way I’m back!

I’ve removed some of the negative influences from my life over the past month and I’m ready to focus on the good that I have and the friends that are worthy.

This bunny is once again bright eyed and bushy tailed! 😀

Love You Sir ❤


Happy Thursday!

Finally feeling better and looking forward to a good evening and even better weekend! Some thoughts to get your day started (or continued) on the right foot!

Not too much else to report – starting to feel more and more like myself and feeling a bit playful right now! 🙂

I wonder how much ‘trouble’ I can get into without actually getting into trouble?? LOL Might be one of those evenings Sir …. I hope you’re in a good and playful mood! hehehe I think I’ve been down too long …. I need to get my bounce back.

Love You Always Sir ❤