Normally after his lumbar and marrow test, we hear back from the doctor within a day or two. That was Tuesday, today is Sunday …. no word yet.

The last time I remember not having any word was when the Leukemia had relapsed.

I am trying not to dwell on that, I am trying to think only positive thoughts and that the doctor is simply coordinating with the other hospital in Toronto for the stem cell transplant before he calls us back.

No point in making two calls when you only need to make one, right? He is a very busy man after all with the staff shortages etc. He had mentioned if we wanted to go ahead to call him back and he would let TO know on Friday and video conference with them likely Tuesday.

That’s the reason we haven’t heard, right?

*sigh* It damn well better be!

Kink too has been frustrating, both Bear and I have been under the weather and trying our damndest not to make W sick! My condition being as it is always likes to stick it’s head in for the worst possible times too!

I’ve been bleeding for over 2 weeks and this morning I started bleeding even harder! Like blood clots really instead or a normal mensural cycle. Sorry boys …. but it’s true. Needless to say kink and sex may not fix everything but they do give us an outlet and a connection that we have come to rely on.

I’d be worried about the bleeding only it’s not the first time, it happens more often then I like. Not normally for weeks at a time but the crazy amount of blood and lack of energy etc is my monthly normal. UGH

“Just keep swimming, just keep swimming!”

Another day, another test.

Tomorrow morning we are back to London for the 3 month checkup! Fingers crossed that W is still in remission and that the CAR-T therapy is still working.

Physically he looks great! He has more energy than he has had since last November, he is able to eat again and it seems he has stopped losing weight! All good signs! He has some of his strength back and I have been urging him to do some exercises to build and keep his strength up so that when we do go through with the stem cell transplant he will be able to tolerate and bounce back faster.

On the kinky front, Bear and I have been enjoying some intense and much needed reconnection to our way of life. The last week and a half not withstanding! lol Life never fails to step in the way but we are not backing down, my health is usually the culprit followed by W’s doctors appointments and procedures. We certainly can’t do anything about those things but we can work around them! *smiles*

Our dive into M/s has had us trying out some kinky ideas that I never would have thought we’d be interested in. Never say never I suppose. Then again, if you look at the list of ‘yeses’ and ‘hard limits’ when we started out and the list now, you’d see some stuff has simply switched columns!

We’ve (or should I say, I’ve) gotten smart about our kink and the simple fact that we make it our own! I know, I know it’s something we hear and say all the time but just like most things in life – the idea is simple, the application for some reason seems so much more difficult!

It’s opened up a bunch of new kinks that we are/and have been trying and has made our kinky travels that much more enjoyable. I think Bear has also finally found some acceptance and peace in the life that we have chosen. I think he has finally just let himself be …. that, plus my new take on communication, too!

Basically – radical honesty! Thought we were doing that before, found we could actually do more! Always learning, always trying, always talking ….

That’s what we’ve learned and that’s what’s been making even this current life situation manageable!

Till we meet again …. ❤