I don’t think i’ll surprise anyone who has been doing this for a while when i say that things change and flow sometimes in a completely different direction than you thought when you add D/s to an existing, ‘vanilla’ marriage. No matter the reason you started, it almost always moves on it’s on accord and NOT what you envisioned. *chuckle*
My last post commented on the idea that i don’t personally find domestic duties to be submissive in nature. I think much of that stems from the fact that i/we have had these chores for over 22 years now and they have changed and been done by whomever was available depending on time and familial responsibilities.
Simply put i don’t see ‘His’ laundry or my laundry … i see laundry. I don’t make ‘His’ dinner, i make dinner … etc. I suppose if i saw any of these things as submissive acts i would be submitting to myself as well! *chuckle* I hope this makes some sense ..
I can see how these things would work well if i was coming into someone else’s home, ‘playing’ for the weekend or even for an extended period of time or having a nice vacation visit, but under my own circumstances it just doesn’t feel that way.
When you take all the stories and blogs out there and try to find your way through it’s hard sometimes to reconcile why it is you can’t seem to get that feeling they speak of when you try the same methods. I think for me at least this explains why.
This leaves a lot of work to be done in finding ways of keeping the feelings strong in the day-to-day happenings. Especially when play is difficult to come by and you have a very pragmatic look on life as i do.
So i’m looking deep again inside my mind to understand the types of things that i will need to help bring that feeling and keep it alive. The secret to submission in my opinion lies within me. Things are settling around here a bit and i’m ready to add more to this dynamic. I’m ready to have some fun with it again.
It won’t work unless He joins in of course, i’m not saying it’s ALL on me, but it does start here. The foundation has been here since the beginning, it’s strong and unshakable but now it’s time to get back into the fun!! *wink*