Silly really

The weekend’s coming, i always get excited for the weekend. It’s not that we are going anywhere or doing anything super special. It’s just a bit quieter and calmer, no work to run to and come home from tired and distracted. Nothing to have to switch gears from. 😀

It’s just us …. well and the boys. The house is never empty, but some day! That reminds me, when does the walking dead start up again??? Not soon enough! *giggle*

Bear says He has some Evil ideas for when the house is our own. I guess we’ll see if it’s just messing with my head or if He actually means it!

I’m not very easy to mess with though, not much throws me off-balance. Not sure if anything does these days!! *chuckle* Most of what i read out there is things that i would have done anyway. Before we had kids i naturally did all these things anyway that are supposed to be ‘taboo’ in vanilla life.

The things we don’t do are things that are on both of our hard limits list anyway …. we are well matched that way.

Anyway, weekend is upon us, i’m excited. i always have some interesting ideas running through my head, maybe this weekend i’ll give some of them a try! *wink* We’ve been under the weather but hopefully that clears up enough, for both of us!

Getting excited at my age, silly really …. oh well. Happy Friday all!

A need? Instinct? Perhaps it’s simply a natural desire …

** My view, my opinion on my life. This is not meant as a commentary on how anyone else should feel or approach their own life. This is just me …. **

When I started searching and joining online groups to explore the ‘lifestyle’ it made me feel like i was faking it. I didn’t want to be fake but i just couldn’t relate to a lot of what i heard and what i read.

I kept hearing about a ‘need’ to be submissive, an inability to be happy without a ‘dom’ etc etc. …. like life was somehow less than without it. That didn’t fit for me, it still doesn’t, not like that. So here we go back to the theory of the dragon! *smiles* (Bear and i had a wonderful, exciting conversation about this last night so i thought to try to explain some of it here.)

I will try to keep it short and sweet! You see the romanticized story that i enjoy goes as follows:

The rider does not pick the dragon, the dragon is the one who has the choice. A dragon egg will lie dormant for years just waiting for the right rider to come along. When He does (i’m going with He because it suits my situation but feel free to change it to suit yours.) the egg begins to awaken. The rider must then choose to take up the responsibility of keeping the egg and eventually the dragon is born. From that moment on the two are linked, a bonded pair.

As the dragon grows stronger the rider grows wiser and more able to fulfill His duties. Eventually the rider begins to realize the full extent of His powers, and His powers over the dragon. You see, the dragon is wise and strong, capable of many things and most certainly not meek about speaking up HOWEVER now that they have bonded the rider has final say, in everything.

What happens to one now happens to the other, they feel each others pain and joy. All of it … Eventually as the rider matures He begins to see the world through the eyes of the dragon. He begins to realize the worth and wisdom of listening and learning from what the dragon can impart. His eyes are open to a whole new way of looking at the world. As their connection grows so too does their strength, together.

The dragon gives the rider power and wisdom, the rider gives the dragon safety and life.

Now to wrap it up, in the end, the dragon is strong and powerful and obviously very capable on its own. The dragon is the one who chooses the rider but now that they are bonded, the dragon can not live without its rider. If the dragon dies the rider can remain but if the rider dies, the dragon dies.

The dragon submits its life entirely into the hands of its rider. The dragon’s main priority is and will always be the well-being of the rider for you see without the rider, there is no dragon. Without a dragon ….. you are no rider. So who’s holding who? It gets hard to tell at times. LoL

So is it a need of mine? No, it’s a choice. A choice i made that lives and dies with one man.

Certainly romanticized but for me it fits. I’m submitting to Him in strength and in turn He listens and hears my council. I’m not weak and i’m not hiding my strength either. I’ve let Him take the reins over me and in turn i get His full devotion.

Romanticized Life

Been having an interesting and fun conversation recently that has brought me back to my romanticized notion of what we do. I like to normally pull from things that are more practical for the sake of being understood but this post is more for fun, and for me! *chuckle*

I haven’t time to explain it all and unless you ‘know’ it likely won’t matter anyway. *wink* But as the site title says …. Dragons, Warriors and rabbits!

And a blast from a past post …. I’ve always liked this one! 😉

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Like a hummingbird ….

We had some social time this weekend, it’s not my first choice for spending my free time but I do enjoy it. Most often! *wink*

The Bear enjoys taking me out, i think He likes showing me off and … well, He likes that i don’t often have any shortage of attention!

imagesHe watches me flutter like a hummingbird, hovering in one area for a bit then off to the next, and then the next … always to come back to land in His arms.

Everyone else seems to notice that too ….. there was no shortage of comments made. It’s becoming pretty common.

I learned how to socialize by watching Him, now a days He watches me! LoL It’s funny the amount of personal growth you can have by appreciating the strengths of others. I could have begrudged Him that all those years ago but i didn’t.

I realized from the beginning that He was my exact opposite and my perfect complement. My weaknesses were His strengths and His acceptance and encouragement helped me to find my own way.

I learned my value by getting a glimpse of what He saw and I became stronger still. I listened, i learned, i grew …

I hope i’ve been able to give Him something in return! ❤

Emerging from the den …

fyi…. a bit early perhaps!

Every time i sit to write this happens:

writing writing writing …. that’s all that comes to my head … writing writing writing! No more … so this will be a bit of a jumble!

Monday will be here soon and with that so is back to school and back to work. The cubs will need teaching and protecting once more. I’ve often referred to us as a wolf pack and something about winter brings that back full circle, again,

Maybe it’s that i sit and watch the documentaries on tv, they always remind me of just how much my life and inner circle revolves around basic primal needs. That’s how i run my life, my family, it has never been anything more than that.

It clashes greatly with everything i see and read about the dynamic, about D/s, but there it is. Like the alpha female of the pack i have many responsibilities. I run the pack in many ways and show leadership and self-reliance without that taking away from my place ‘under’ Him.

He is bigger and stronger than me but i most certainly pull my own weight and have my own following. It’s just a simple way of life, a hierarchy.

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I show Him I’m His every so often and then i go about the rest of my business.

My place in the pack is too important to do it any other way, and if i wasn’t as strong as i am he wouldn’t have picked me to be by His side anyway. *shrug*

The wolf is my spirit animal, i tap into that whenever i need, i need it now. The new year brings new challenges and new adventures.

I’m ready!

The ‘break’ has been less than exciting, not much happening outside of a few family get togethers, that’s fine with me. Not sure if The Bear has missed out on some social time because of it but if He has He hasn’t mentioned it.

There hasn’t been much in regards to ‘play’ but then i haven’t exactly been setting off those ‘vibes’ either. It sets Him into a strange place, i can tell. He just seems a bit ‘off’, distant?, ‘in His head’ …. perhaps that’s the term. He starts looking for ways to fill the time, make busy as they say.

I think we have tapped into something that He didn’t know He needed, quite so badly. That’s the danger of this thing we do isn’t it? Once you get into it you might not be able to get back out.

The first week off was between Christmas and New Years and the second saw me starting my cycle. That’s not normally a time we play because my physical issues that stem from that right now are just too severe. Throw in a cold ‘bug’ and the fact that i need to chase the youngest around all day to get him caught up on his schooling before it starts again ….. and the two weeks are practically over! (His meds seem to be working and he seems much better at getting things done and having the energy, both emotionally and physically now that we changed things around, to get the job done BUT that means we have a lot of catch up from the time before … )

I seem to be back to ‘rights’ ATM and the weekend is upon us, let’s hope for a bit of time to reconnect before it all gets back into full swing! I could use some serious time away from the ‘trials’ of life and out of my head but i’m not sure just how far we can get. I’m not sure how much time we can sneak away before someone comes calling or someone needs something.

Like i said, perhaps emerging a bit TOO early!

Having young adult children was supposed to afford me a bit more time, not less.

When we were young and alone our sex life was very primal. We might not have used toys and chains but the tone was most certainly set. He has always been adventurous and I have always been animalistic. In the moment and unabashed ….

Sometimes, in these quiet moments, i feel the hunger to have that back with the addition of the most intense and freeing froms of our BDSM. We have tasted it, we have seen the power and the seduction.

For now we wait …… and the hunger grows.

Oh, now that looks interesting! *grin*

I found something new, I’m interested in showing The Bear and seeing what He thinks of it. It’s not exactly completely new in regards to the actions BUT the idea of how and why is, at least it is new to us.

I can think of many benefits and i can also think of many parallels to things we already do in D/s and BDSM.

I’m absolutely not interested in trying it outside of my marriage but ……. with my partner, i’m hoping He agrees! *grin*

(Video is explicit – Warning )

Anyone familiar with this?

Do you incorporate it into your dynamic?

Have you found it to be beneficial?

Personally i think of it as much like edging only without the ‘O’ being the focus, now or later even. It’s more about releasing happy chemicals and lower stress levels without the need for impact play and all the time and noise that it brings. We all know that noise is a factor around here! UGH

I’m putting this one under personal female sexual health and welfare. I’ve said before, chastity is not a thing for me but this might be! *wink* Wish me luck!! *giggle*

I also have a feeling that the connection and need to be with each other is also going to strengthen ….. guess we’ll see.

Oh Yes, and Happy New Year everyone! ❤