This post is BDSM specific. It’s an understanding of how His dominance works when it comes to play and BDSM. It’s my learning of my dominant and how He likes things to work. It’s me learning to be His sexual and BDSM submissive.
I’m learning that my dominant likes to play by the vampire rules. *chuckle* No i don’t mean He likes to bite and draw blood, although He does enjoy using His teeth! No, what i mean is that He likes to wait for an invitation …..
It’s also fair game if you invite them in. An invitation can be revoked later, but a single invitation is considered “open until specifically revoked”, meaning that these beings can come and go as they please once invited.
What this means to me is that if *i* want to be His in that way i need to somehow extend the invitation. He is making me ask, making me beg for it if that makes it better or sexier in the mind! *wink* More in keeping with your understanding of D/s …. He’s making me work for it! Ugh ……. such Evil!
I guess it’s His way of ensuring that what He’s doing is consensual and still very much the way i want to be His and please. It’s a way of knowing that i enjoy His Evil side no matter how ‘wrong’ it might appear from the outside looking in.
Once I have opened the door however ……
Although He is not the one to start things very often He sure seems to enjoy every moment from the invite forward! At first this felt like i was the one who wanted and needed to play this way and He was simply going along for my sake. I don’t believe that to be true any longer. Like i said, vampire rules, He can’t play until i invite it.
It might seem contrary or strange, especially if you read all the books and fantasies but i think it’s pretty practical actually. It certainly gives Him the information on where my mind is and where my energies are …. Let’s Him know how and what i need.
He still decides what to do about it, when and how much … although i dare say that me finally giving in to dominance HIS way has certainly unleashed the beast!
Learning how to be His submissive is learning how to do things His way, without second guessing, without wondering if i’m still topping, without wondering if He really does want to do this for Himself. Without not trusting Him …..
My husband has always been a romantic, how appropriate it is that He has taken His ‘Evil’ side and lined it up with another romanticized version of what we do …. *wink*
I’ve learned a lot in the past two months of how it is He likes to lead and me to follow in this …. i hope He’s finding me more and more pleasing all the time! ❤
Vampire ….. go figure!