- characterized by lack of seriousness or sense:frivolous conduct.
- self-indulgently carefree; unconcerned about or lacking any serious purpose.
- (of a person) given to trifling or undue levity:
I’ve had this conversation a number of times with a number of people. The Bear and i just started to talk about it again the other night. Today I read something that reminded me again.
Okay universe, i get it! LoL Next post idea, frivolous!
I don’t like labels and i never fit in any way so that makes it a perfect ideal! When getting into this ‘lifestyle’ i was bombarded with labels, ideas of what it is to be each one and how you need to change or adapt if you want to be ‘one’ …. whatever that one was that you chose.
There’s another thought as well, be ‘one’ …. well i’m not just one. I don’t want to be just one, i want to be me! Like i said in the last post i change and go with the flow depending on the day and situation. There is more than one aspect to my personality and so there is more than just one aspect to my submission.
First is the warrior, the one that goes out and takes on the world. The one i use most often in my day-to-day dealings. This is the part of my personality that takes care of work, the boys, the administration when needed and the mental health issues that arise from time to time. The one that takes control of any situation and finds solutions, the serious and taking care of business, no-nonsense times.
This is the one i was stuck in before we decided to try D/s. This one left no space for the Bear, the Sir, the Master in my life, or so He thought.
Second is the nijntje, the one that comes out now that He is in control of things and shouldering His share of life and responsibilities. Not to imply that He didn’t before, we had just gotten to the point where i was doing it all and He sat back and let me, now He steps in and does things Himself, takes them off my plate so I don’t have to.
If someone asks why someone like me would even want to be submissive to me husband 24/7, this is why. Allowing Him to lead allows me to breathe!
And now the bunny! Bunny has been around since the beginning of our relationship but as things got more serious and responsibilities piled on the bunny went to sleep.
Warrior mode leaves no room to be silly or goof around, there is always something that needs tending and at the time no one was helping carry the load. I didn’t ask either, i don’t want this to sound all one-sided, i had a hand in getting to where we did as well.
So bunny, bunny is silly and goofy and loves to just play. Bunny is relaxed and funny, tells jokes and grins … ALL the time. Bunny gets excited at the first sight of snow and dances in the rain.
Bunny gives *raspberries*, scrunched up her nose when she doesn’t like something and *pouts*, especially when it’s time to put on moisturizer!! *giggle* Bunny is small and fragile, carefree, it took a bit of time to get used to bunny without having my feelings hurt because bunny has a BIG heart and takes everything personally that the Bear says.
Bunny knows He’s just teasing, so now it’s okay. Bunny is the one that smacks the Bear in the @ss and then *run*!!! *giggle*
I’m not ‘little’, i’m not childish or immature. I’m not a brat, although Bear does like a bit of that, I don’t see an age or child in my mind’s eye when I talk about bunny, I see a rabbit.
If you were to look at labels alone the Bear would probably fit fairly well into the Daddy Dom category although He doesn’t like that title what so ever. That’s fine with me because the idea of calling Him daddy turns my stomach. Not because I’m against the dynamic, just because of my own personal history. (See what happened there? The i changed to I. There are subtle hints to ‘who’ is writing. *wink*)
Although He likes to stay ‘there’ He also has other aspects of His personality and they come out to match mine at any given time.
I hope I don’t regret using these labels but:
The Master compliments the Warrior. When I’m in that mode I need Him in His, again He doesn’t like the title Master so I call Him Evilness, He knows what I need.
The Sir compliments nijnjte. When I use that title, again He knows what I need.
The Bear compliments the bunny. I think you can guess what I’m going to say here … *raspberries* bunny will use the title Bear most often but sometimes Sir as well. He can tell by the mischief in my eyes what i need then anyway. *giggle*
This works the same for Him as well. If He calls out nijntje or bunny or …. well I won’t tell you what He calls me to take on the warrior, i’ll leave that to your imagination! LoL
See, not just one, not fitting into any label or dynamic but it works. The trigger words allow us to recognize needs and move from one energy to the next as we flow through our days.