Not a D/s post

Our relationship to us is much more important than D/s. Some people would argue that D/s couples are closer than non-D/s couples and I personally have never found that to be true here.

Just like every D/s couple/relationship is different, so too are all the others. I have never liked blanket statements and I still don’t like it here.

We may not have talked about power exchanges and kink but we did talk about everything else. We both knew likes and dislikes of the other and we both tried to be our best for the other. That has never changed. We discovered each others strengths and weaknesses as we grew together in this relationship and we divided things up accordingly, to work out the best for ‘us’. It wasn’t him or me, it was and always has been us.

We ended up here in D/s land for a few reasons and yes things did get a bit difficult for a short while but even D/s relationships change and experience growing pains. We got to the point that it was time to renegotiate needs and wants because we were growing and evolving as people. So we did …..

I wanted to explore the world of kink and he was uncertain but for me, he’d try. We had always been adventurous but I wanted more. Needless to say ‘the rest is history’!

I also needed him to step back in and shoulder some of the responsibility that is our life, and so he did. Things were changing, boys were growing and my physical and mental state needed attention too, so we assessed and made changes. Doesn’t that sound familiar to you?

I think that when you believe you are ‘better’ than someone else, in any respect, you are on a slippery slope.

I was going to tell you all a cute story about fabric softener, humm, somehow the first sentence change the entire post! *shrug* Happy Saturday!

9 thoughts on “Not a D/s post

  1. Sadly or no, people romanticize D/s relationship as being more authentic, delightful and desirable. As if the D/s couple exists in a magic mansion, just dressed in Gothic finery, drinking exquisite liquors and fucking all day long, no cares in the world.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I think you’ve hit on my retirement plan princesse! LoL

      Truthfully though, I’ve read about enough messed up D/s couples to know that in the end people are people, the label matters not. Some work together and some are much more worried about themselves than anyone else. D/s doesn’t change that. If anything I’ve seen submissives put up with much more than they perhaps should because they feel they have no choice.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. We all need a retirement plan!!

        I absolutely agree–the person in the relationship is who he or she is. D/s doesn’t somehow turn someone noble and gracious. If it happen, it is because they worked on such but D/s is not the magic wand from Cinderellla.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Princess stole the words from my mouth on this one. I have always said, even at my less knowledgeable points, that D/s is highly romanticized as being the more ‘authentic’ way to love and live. There is no perfect dynamic, no perfect Dom or Sub, no ideal way of doing “the thing”.

    We all learn as we go, in truth? We are no different that cosplayers on a stage, that is not to say we do not have core values or set protocols.

    But the notion that D/s cures everything, and always brings some kind of “next level love” is bogus.

    Hope you’re well, friend.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks Larkin! I’m doing pretty well these days! 😀

      I think perhaps in some cases D/s actually makes things worse because people get into it with an exaggerated expectation and when it doesn’t work they blame themselves.

      ‘I’m not a good enough submissive, or Dom’ … etc. OR they run around chasing a ‘feeling’ that they think should follow them all day long. When real life comes in and they feel less then ‘floaty’ they get worried and deflated.

      It’s simply unrealistic, unless like princesse said, you are lucky enough to have that mansion!


  3. Aand I’m just supposed to let tell whole fabric softener thing go? Like I won’t wonder for days? I mean it’s ok I have my own vivid imagination I can make up my own story. You know how I feel about general statements, blankets are for keeping warm. We each make the relationship that works for us. No two relationships should look simular, they are a one off a custom jon . Any way that’s how I explain our craziness to kitten

    Liked by 1 person

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