Annoyed, but still respectful.

Today I find myself a bit annoyed with The Bear. Yes, I am allowed to have feelings despite being His submissive, it’s how I go about dealing with them that makes the difference!

I’ve tried to rationalize the issue but it’s not going away so I know I need to talk to Him about it. If I don’t talk about it, it will just simmer in the back ground. The next time something small comes up it will be made bigger than it actually is etc. etc. ….

The issue will keep growing and I will become resentful and probably mouthy. I will be eventually speaking in anger instead of sense and patience and what is right now just something small that needs to be vented will turn into some difficult times. So why would I want that?

The point of being His submissive is to go to Him when something is going on, not to keep things from Him. The fact that I know I’m going to talk about it already has me calmer, the fact that I know He will listen and understand my view is also making me calmer. Just knowing that I will be heard is already diffusing the situation ….

I’m not going to bug Him at work with it, it’s not an emergency. I’m not going to bother Him when He first walks through the door either. I will greet Him with a kiss and a smile, I’ll get His things put away and I will ask Him about His day. Sometime after He showers and maybe before dinner (it’s not going to be a long conversation I’m sure) or perhaps after dinner, I will let Him know something is bugging me and I’d like to tell Him about it and clear the air.

We will sit down, I will tell Him what I’m thinking and He will explain to me why or why not, or perhaps He will agree ….. regardless of how it plays out I will feel heard and my feelings validated and He will feel respected and understood.

I don’t think this is a D/s only scenario honestly, but it seems to be missing in a lot of other relationships that I hear about. The D/s part will be that I’ll be wearing His collar and sitting at His feet, everything else should be just the way of it in my opinion.

Respect is not a D/s only idea and it flows both ways ….

Love You Always Sir! ❤

7 thoughts on “Annoyed, but still respectful.

  1. Before starting D/s, Sir and I would try to communicate the ‘issues’ but we would both become so defensive it was hard. Ive noticed we’ve gotten a lot better at communicating in a nondefensive way. I think part of it is that we both know the other is more committed to the other.
    You are right that communication and respect should be in any relationship. I think those things get amplified by healthy D/s couples, just from what I’ve read/experienced.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They do seem to be amplified, you’re quite right. I think negotiating wants, needs and limits makes communication and honesty a necessity, it in return becomes part of the everyday.

      It still shocks me that they are not ‘normal’ in all relationships but perhaps with all these D/s sites popping up others will get the idea too. Even if you’re not kinky or into formal TPE! *wink*

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well one can hope I suppose! I like to be optimistic when possible, this seems like a good a time as any. Another good reason for me to stay away from labels and kinky stories and just talk about life in general. Can’t hurt can it? LoL

        Liked by 1 person

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