When I/We first started down this road of ‘whatever it is’ and spankings for bad behaviour and such, *I* wasn’t the one having issues controlling my temper and mouth ….
I have never been one to speak rudely to anyone, I have practiced patience and understanding since I was very young and I have never been one to feel entitled to anything … perhaps that’s why ?!?! Don’t know, maybe …
When things started getting tense for us it was certainly because I had all the control and Sir had none but I wasn’t the one unhappy and acting out, He was. It was a huge leap of faith on my part for sure to bring this ‘thing’ to him and decide to give it a try. I didn’t particularly like the way He was behaving at the time but I did know that He had it in Him to do better and be better and frankly I was getting tired of doing and being it all on my own.
It wasn’t all terrible fights and yelling, don’t get me wrong we really have never been like that – but He was stepping away, getting distant and basically checking out because He felt unnecessary and redundant I suppose.
If ever He does need to punish me He follows through and it makes me feel both cared for and wanted, but it doesn’t happen often. It’s been about a year and a half now since I have actually been in trouble for behaviour and I have no intention of breaking that streak! 😉 We’ve been at this a while now and I can count the times on one hand …. almost all in the beginning and frankly all due to a bit more alcohol than perhaps was wise!
What has changed with this new-found power is His new found (or not so new now) desire to check His own behaviour, not just mine. You can’t discipline someone if you don’t keep track of their behaviour and that causes you to keep track of your own. You also can’t discipline someone for things and then turn around and do them yourself … at least my Sir certainly can’t do it with a clear conscience.
Spankings/discipline doesn’t just make me better, it makes us both better, it’s a two-way street. It makes us both accountable.
Funny thing how and why we started isn’t it? Seems to be backwards from most of what I hear, but then again that seems to be the norm here! LOL
We have since decided we like the closeness and stress relief of the ‘impact play’ but it’s done outside of punishment, none of the guilt and all of the benefit.
Love You Always Sir! ❤