Is the grass ever really greener …. ?

I wrote a post some time ago about comparing and I have had an idea running in and out of my mind about keeping score … I haven’t had the time or the where with all to put it into words just yet but now I have another ‘grass is always greener’ idea that has popped in …. if I don’t get something down, I’m going to lose track!

The culmination of these things however I think is all the same …. it seems to me that some people tend to be so stuck in chasing the dream and chasing the fantasy that they don’t realize what is sitting right in front of them is every bit what they want and likely more that what the other side of the fence is offering. The off-limits, best behaviour, excitement that comes from a new and unknown relationship is great but the fact is that if you stop putting that energy and excitement and acceptance into where you are that new and exciting adventure on the other side of the fence will in fact turn into the same grass you have here and now. As a friend of mine said not to long ago, “how many steps do you have to take before you realize it was just a can of paint?”

The new ‘partner’ is exciting because you choose to make it so, the actions are sweet or hot because you choose to make it so. You are likely putting a lot of time, energy and belief into this thing you want to participate in so badly, how much are you putting into your current/old side of the fence?

Image result for grass is always greener

If you pursue your mate/wife/husband with the same excitement and enthusiasm as you chose to put towards this new person I can bet you that the pay off will be something pretty great! If you put your judgement aside and put every action into the best possible light at the same time you are on your best behaviour and actively trying to please and win the heart of that person than I have a hard time believing that for the most part your partner won’t be at least intrigued and possibly even happily swept off their feet with joy!

Likewise, once the world, work, life, bills, money and responsibility hit your new and exciting fantasy you might find it also becomes lacking and a bit less green! That is of course assuming that the fantasy ever makes it to 24/7 ….

You want a better life, make it happen! The fantasy is great because of the time and effort you have provided for it, your current life could be too. If that is truly not the case, than let it go! That person you are lying to (besides yourself) deserves the truth.

As Sir so eloquently put it ‘The grass is only as green as you chose to make it’!

Sir had yard work to do and because of the temperature and my raynaud’s I was not allowed to go outside, so I got a chance to finish this one …. 😀 At some point I may be able to write how all of this comes together or matters to me ….  but for now my basic thoughts will have to do! 

Part of that personality I was talking about is the fact that I believe nothing is unattainable with the right amount of effort, persistence and mostly the right attitude! 

Night All!

Thank you for doing the yard work Sir! ❤ I’m still not happy about staying in though …. UGH! LOL

19 thoughts on “Is the grass ever really greener …. ?

  1. I really don’t like the argument of “just try harder and you’ll be amazed.” Because you have absolutely no control over another person and who they choose to be. Sometimes people grow apart over time. It’s a nice thought that if you give more it will all work out but sometimes it just leads to “No” over and over and over. For years. And then you start to change who you are to fit who they allow you to be. Because that is what you have to do when you “try harder”. You do whatever it takes to make the relationship work. Then you find, many years later, that you have lost who you are. It turns out that either your relationship was a partial lie or you grew apart. Either way you have no more to give. Trying harder is over.

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    1. I could not possibly agree more! This is what happened to me. I was once very quiet, always submissive, and His girl in every way. But over time and His lack of attention – it all faded away and now I find I’m not sure I’m capable of being what He wants or even if I know what I want myself. I found my own dominance which I do not enjoy, but there it is. He ignored me for so many years and now that He is ready and willing to be devoted to me I’m not sure I have it in me any more. I love Him… but the submissive me who once would have jumped and asked “how high?” has left the building.

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      1. I’m sorry you feel that way about your husband and about the turn your life has taken and I know that you have tried over and over from our previous conversations but just as I told R. Patience there are a lot of others out there who don’t try …. and a lot of others I have been witness to.
        My conversation with you would be very different, and likely not at all what you would expect but I haven’t been asked for my opinion and therefore I will keep it to myself.

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      2. I would prefer a back and forth scenario for discussion because, well so many things are dependent on the last (answer) that the variables are simply too many to account for in a ‘monologue’ answer back to you … Not sure if that makes any sense at all to you.
        I would prefer a ‘chat’ with input along the way from both sides (your and mine). I have a suspicion you might be surprised by some of my answers … LOL

        Liked by 1 person

      3. This is difficult because I am usually only available in the very late evenings and not much at all during the weeks Master is off, such as this next week starting tomorrow. Which is the reason I’ve not reached out to chat or call you or connect in another way. I’m also actually incredibly shy IRL and have very few friends. It takes me a while to warm up enough to talk in person… which is why the anonymity of print works well for someone like me. I am so sorry. However, I will say that not much people say surprises me anymore! And I try very hard to not judge.

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    2. I know your situation is not a good one but I can tell you it was not the inspiration for the post, just in case you feel that way. The original ‘comparing’ was written a year ago and this is a continuation of that, and other things that go on around me.
      Losing yourself is never the answer, but there are a lot of other instances in which people are simply not trying. There are always exceptions and it would seem you are one and for that I am sorry.

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      1. Sorry I wasn’t clearer ma’am. Sometimes a dry/wry humor is an impediment.

        You commented (basically) to the effect that not everyone makes a good faith effort. The reply was an emphasis on the fact that I see few make an actual concerted effort and, hence, I consider your comment a great understatement. That made me wonder if you were going for the title of “Ms. Understatement 2016”. Yes, I’m also a bit corny sometimes.

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      2. Ah! Understood 😀 with the other comments above I wasn’t sure if you were agreeing or disagreeing with the post! LOL
        It seems to me that we have become such a society based on everything being disposable that even our relationships have turned that way ,… I was attempting to be conservative.
        BTW I like your humour, now that I know which lawn your on! 😛 lol

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