Submission 101 – Talking and Understanding

I think that one of the main aspects of my submission is the time and effort put towards talking to and understanding Sir. Taking the time to understand exactly what it is that makes Him feel dominant and in control and in turn putting that information to use in my daily life.

The books, the stories, the sites out there are all interesting and some even have some good starting points but when it comes to us and our relationship there really are only two experts, US! I’m sure that there are as many versions of D/s as there are couples and relationships and to think that everyone does things exactly the same, or to think that what one dominant wants is the same as another is silly and often times leads to nothing but hurt and trouble.

So if you believe that to be basically true than why would the submissive side of the coin be any different? In order for Sir to understand and care for me and my needs He too needs me to voice my likes, dislikes, wants and hopes. Without all the information about what’s really going on in my mind Sir couldn’t possibly do His job and lead our relationship. Like wise, if I start taking care of all my own issues without involving Him in any part of it than I am not allowing Him to lead me in that area either. But that is another post ….

I had a hard time in the beginning being able to tell Him what I wanted and needed and telling Him things that I would like to try or needed help with. I didn’t want to be leading the relationship and I didn’t want to feel like I was making the decisions and so it was hard to put that into the perspective of being submissive.

The reality is that once Sir has all the information He is still the one deciding what to do about it. Being able to take charge and lead properly and effectively in any situation requires the leader to first become familiar with and understand all of the important information available on the subject. In this case the subject is me.

Just as I need to listen and understand His wants and needs in order to better submit, so too does He need to understand mine. Not communicating would be a disservice to my Master which means that telling Him my desires is not leading, it’s just necessary!

Can’t wait till the weekend, Happy Friday!

Love You Sir ❤


2 thoughts on “Submission 101 – Talking and Understanding

  1. You are so right nijntje. This is a two way street and for each of us to have the full story if you will,is the only way for us to do what needs to be done. The open communication is not always easy but it is so much more fulfilling when it is done. You are mine and I am yours and we need to know all to grow together.

    Liked by 2 people

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