In the 21 years that we have been together I think I have been to the grocery store less than a handful of times by myself, and I have gone pretty much every week. Sir always drives ….
In 21 years I have slept by myself twice, a couple of years a ago Sir told me to go on a trip away with a friend, we were gone 2 nights. He knew I needed the time for a variety of reasons, too many and too much to go into detail but He did and so I went. The twice includes the nights at the hospital when having the boys, He stayed with me both times …. the first time I was stuck in the hospital longer due to complications, He still stayed.
Promotions have been turned down for family, we have plenty of time to be away when the boys are bigger and no longer at home. It has even been discussed that if His job still wants Him overseas then I will simply quit mine and go along …
We have sat together for dinner every single night in the past 15 years outside of illness. Shift work used to be a problem but it has been straight days and Monday to Friday almost exclusively for 15 years and counting. If working a weekend was not avoidable we were always home for dinner.
One never goes out without the other, if family or friends see us alone they know that something is ‘wrong’. We go for a walk together almost every night weather and health permitting.
I don’t ever remember going anywhere or doing anything without first asking Him what He thought and if it was okay. I have cooked supper pretty much every day we have been together unless we decided together to go somewhere or order in, unless Sir decided on His own He wanted something different.
We have always talked about everything and made every decision together, Sir has always had final say, even if He didn’t realize it. I have never bought anything without His knowing and before D/s I would actually buy less, He didn’t realize I was waiting on approval. (Neither did I, in a real sense.)
Outside of the menopausal/breakdown-ish time of about 6 months in our lives when my mind was just a bit crazy and Sir was so distant, I have never yelled, been angry or been rude to my husband, I had never disregarded His wishes and I had never, or have never since, not thought of Him first. (I yelled at Him once …. )
I remember distinctly my first and only time when my mind said ‘I wonder what He would like, you know what, I don’t care … it was the lowest low for me and I was almost physically sick with the realization. It was just weeks before bringing this idea to Him because that’s when I knew something was off for me. And that’s when I knew something had to change …. so I researched, tried to figure out what was going wrong and why we were drifting apart.
Some where in my ‘travels’ I realized that He didn’t think I needed Him, that He didn’t think He was important, D/s makes Him know the truth.
I don’t know what you want to call what we were before, to me the only real change is that now we have a ‘name’ and Sir can be certain because we also have some symbols to prove it and serve as a reminder.
He has always been Him and I have always been me with Him …. You might say we have been lucky, I say we have choosen wisely, prioritized …..
Love You Sir ❤