Before anyone goes off about this topic I would ask you to kindly read all of what I have to say before forming your own opinion and secondly this is MY opinion and I am entitled to have one, just as you are entitled to agree or disagree ….. thank you.

I don’t believe you should be engaging in any sort of BDSM play if you have mental and emotional issues that you are trying to figure out and/or hiding from. I don’t believe you are in the proper mindset to make a ‘safe, sane and consensual’ decision.

Making decisions in this state is no different then making decisions while intoxicated if you ask me. You are not thinking clearly and the choices may not be for the best, or even safe. Using BDSM to cover up your pain or hurt or lack there of is no different then drinking or using drugs for the same reasons. Again, this is my opinion and I am not a certified doctor of any sort but I have dealt with enough emotional and mental baggage to be able to weigh in on this ….

I strongly believe you need to be of sound mind before engaging in this type of activity and any proper dominant will not allow you to partake in BDSM play if your mental state is in question. It is very unsettling to me when I read posts about people using this to cover up their feelings of depression, or anger or hate. It is just as disturbing when I hear of using this to try and ‘feel’ something at all …..

Again, I am speaking from experience here when I tell you that I very strongly disagree with this as a coping mechanism, it does not heal you, it only takes you deeper into the darkness. I do enjoy BDSM play, I find it very relaxing and freeing but it did not fix me. I fixed myself first …. then I very slowly started playing and deciding what was okay for me mentally and what was not. I really suggest to any of you out there to do the same. Fix your demons first …. make sure they are dealt with before you engage in this type of fun or you will only be doing more harm then good in the long run.

I have a couple of hard limits, not many but I know these things will push me into something I do not want to visit because I might not come back from it again. I’ve never felt the victim, quite the opposite I felt very dark, quiet and ominous even,… if I felt anything at all. I needed to heal myself of that before I ever even considered play, not the other way around.

Submissive was a huge step for me …. to trust, to be open, to be honest about how I feel, to let myself feel. I have no intention of messing that up by playing when I’m in a bad place in my mind or heart.

I wouldn’t play if I was numb and I wouldn’t play to become numb …. I play because I no longer am numb.

Love You Sir ❤

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