A Real Dominant

I am forever grateful for the first D/s site that I came across. It was written by a true dominant and full of extremely well thought out and well presented information. I can honestly say that it was his site that made me want to consider this lifestyle.

Now I’ve said before we really did have most of this figured out just naturally between us. The way we act and react with each other has always come naturally to us, at least to me. I don’t count on anyone, never have. I was shown very early in life that only one person was going to take care of my needs and that was me.

You were the first person that I learned to count on and the only one that never made me feel taken advantage of. I don’t think labels or rituals has anything to do with a real dominant. You never gave up on me, you never walked away and lord knows I threw up plenty of road blocks in the beginning. You walked up the the ‘Great Wall of Nijntje’ and pitched a tent, stayed the course. That was over 20 years ago.

Showing me you weren’t going anywhere and you were going to take care of me come Hell or high water, that is the true dominant. Never putting your wants ahead of my needs, that is the true dominant. You were doing all these things long before any label was introduced and that is when I was able to kneel for you. That’s why you have been first in my mind since the day we got together. That’s what I found on the site I was reading, not all this other fantasy that people are trying to imitate now.

A real dominant is much more interested in taking care of His submissive then getting His fantasies lived out. A dominant should never want to make you do anything, a dominant should only accept your actions of submission if they are given freely and without hesitation. A real dominant doesn’t need to make you do anything, a real dominant inspires you to.

When I first read the site I knew that’s what you were. You thought I was crazy …. with all the bad information out there I’m not surprised. You were my dominant long before any sort or kink or ritual was thought of or put into effect. Maybe that’s why we really don’t have issues and maybe that is why I have no problem doing anything you ask. Trust and respect and care come first, everything else is secondary!

Anyone telling you to do it the other way has not earned the right to be called dominant. Contracts, orders and kink do not make you a real dominant.

As for you Sir, you have the right to all of me, anytime, anywhere, anyhow. I have no need to think or worry about whatever it is you ask of me because I know you will always have me first in your mind. That Sir is what makes you a dominant and that is why I will always do anything you ask!

Love You Always Sir ❤



3 thoughts on “A Real Dominant

  1. So much about this resonates in my marriage. Our D/s was so embedded, it was hard to pick out. When I stopped trying to control everything, it easily emerged again, because in truth, he had never stopped putting me first in our life. Ours has not been about kink or fantasies either. Respect, leadership, and honor has been the result of righting our ship.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your comments! It’s always nice to know that someone else sees things or understands things that you are trying to write about! 🙂
      I found I was being so ‘helpful’ and strong that I accidentally made Him feel unnecessary. That is where the ritual and physical actions helps to show Him just how much I really do want Him to be the head of this family.

      Liked by 1 person

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