Mature, self-sufficient and submissive …..

I wrote this a while back but it still holds just as true to me now … I wanted to share it with anyone new to the site. 🙂

nijntje & The Bear

There seems to be a group of people who have a problem equating being emotionally mature and physically self-sufficient with the idea of still being a submissive. Why is that? Why can’t I have a brain and still follow your lead?

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I’m confident that you don’t want me to fall apart every time something doesn’t quite turn out the way I wanted. I’m sure you don’t want me flying into an emotional fit because I didn’t get my way, and then waiting for you to come along and say or do something about it because I can’t think for myself.

Likewise I know you don’t want me sitting back and rubbing my hands because you haven’t gotten around to doing something and I’m afraid you’re going to think I’m taking over if I go ahead and help by doing it for you…. Why do some people seem to think that D/s…

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Simple Truths

The more I kneel for Him the higher up on the pedestal He puts me. The more I follow His lead the more He wants my opinion, and listens. The more I respect Him the more He wants to please me and care for me.

So what is it about this dynamic that people can’t understand?

Love You Always Sir ❤

Submissive AND Independent

To me a very large part of my personality is my independence and I have no want to change that aspect of myself! Neither does my Sir … it’s one of the things he finds extremely attractive as a matter of fact. I think it’s also one thing that makes my submission to Him much more humbling but at the same time empowering and confidence building for Him.

He knows I am very capable of taking care of not only myself but everyone else as well. I don’t get frustrated or overwhelmed by stressful situations I actually excel in that atmosphere. I am not needy or helpless and the truth is I am the person that most run to in times of crises. The domination of nijntje is a ‘ONE OF’ I can assure you.

Sir has earned my trust and my respect and shown me that I can come to Him and trust Him with my inner most demons. As I have said before, being submissive means that I am not alone. I can come to Him and expect to be cared for and guided in anything I might choose to bring Him.

I am not submissive to Him because I think I can’t manage without Him, I don’t call Him Sir because he said so and I don’t kneel for him because he insisted. Quite the contrary, I give myself freely to Him because he has helped me to realize just how strong and powerful I really am. He has made me see things in myself and give myself credit for just how good I really am. He has built me to such a level that I know I can take on the world if I need to.

I submit to Him because he has made me strong enough to ….

Love You Always Sir ❤


Submitting completely – His way

Submission is doing what He wants but it is also not getting upset when there is something He doesn’t want, if His plans don’t match mine or if He just wants something different right now.

If He chooses not to give directions on how my day is to be run then I submit to that want. If He has no need to manage my spending then I will submit to that want. Getting upset because His plan does not match mine is not submission, it’s still leading. Being responsible for myself because that is what He wants, that is submission because it pleases Him. Coming to Him if there is an actual issue and not bothering Him with all sorts of pointless decisions to make, that is submission because that is what makes Him happy. That is what He wants!

Everyone is different and everyone’s wants and needs are different. To submit to your dominant you follow their lead, not someone else’s. The point is to please Him and if whatever list or ritual you have read about does not please Him then it’s not submitting for you to insist on getting it or getting upset because they are not doing it.

If this thing is one of your needs then put it under that umbrella. Bring it to their attention as a want or need of yours. Let them decide whether or not to indulge you and then submit to whatever decision they have made.  They may decide yes to please you, that’s their right! They also might decide no … why would a ‘no’ make you happier? Be happy with the yes if that’s what you get, you must be pleasing them enough to have them want to indulge you. Go with it!

~ As you wish and however you wish Sir ~

Love You Always ❤