So I don’t think it’s fair to write about all these wonderful, happy very fulfilling times and not write about the times where there are hiccups along the road. I am very happy with my life and with my Sir but to think that we are both just fantastically wonderful people who never have issues and never make mistakes would be pretty unrealistic.
So, even though I don’t write about sex I will say that the other night we did experience some miscommunication in expectation which lead to a brief but important stop to play. Sometimes (maybe more then I would like) Sir does forget to inform me of His hopes or desires for the evenings plans. Since I tend to think and think and then think some more this will often leave me unsure of how I am to proceed.
Is the evening for my pleasure, is it for His? Is it perhaps for both of our pleasure and you would like me to verbalize? I don’t know, these are all things that go through my head at lightening speed and I really need your instructions in order to set them free …. Sir is human after all and just like the rest of us sometimes things just run away on Him too. So we stopped, had a good but quick conversation on the importance of His communicating with me, and communicating change of plans also so that I might regroup and follow suit! Wonderful! 😀
Then this evening Sir changes plans again without a word, no communication. This plan is something we have agreed to and something we do as a reaffirmation of place when He gets home from work and I get finished work (I work from home which makes the ritual that much more important). The ritual helps me to know that He is still invested in this dynamic and that I can still come to Him and bring Him my worries and troubles, that I can still count on Him. But He did not give me instructions, He did not follow through and then He gave me my evening collar without word or ceremony. I was confused and a bit off put and it must have shown on my face.
I dutifully followed Him to the car because we were on our way out and finally He did speak up and ask what’s wrong nijntje? I had a choice to make … I wasn’t rude and I wasn’t upset but I did tell him that He was not following through with what He had said and that I was confused and uncomfortable. Finally He said that He knew it was missing and that I did already have my evening collar (likely because He likes it on me if I am out of the house) but He had fully intended on doing it when we got back. Fair enough …
I then stuck up for myself and said that I understand that Sir but after our conversation about you communicating your wants and changes and how I feel when I have no instructions you didn’t follow through with your responsibility to me …. so I don’t think you get to finish the ritual tonight because you messed up and therefor you also should have a consequence.
After some thinking He agreed. If I mess up I lose a privilege, so too does he if He messes up. So there you have it, nothing too dramatic, nothing too crazy …. but it does happen to us once in a while. We communicate about it openly and honestly and we fix it quickly.
I know, not the stuff that high drama and many views are made of but it works for us and it keeps us happy. I’m not in it for the ‘likes’ but I hope it does help anyone out there who is reading.
Love You Always Sir ❤ (but still no)