Working out my hangups

I try to be realistic and honest so that we can have things the way we want them and the way they work best for us but I would be lying if I said that things I have read or people I have spoken with don’t influence my actions in some respect. One of the most difficult for me for whatever reason is the idea of coming on to you instead of always waiting for you to start things with me …

Why in the world one would think that just because you are the dominant you wouldn’t want to be wanted or pursued as well is beyond me. Unfortunately the thought has been put into my head and seems to make me think twice before ‘asking’ for your attention instead of just sitting back and waiting. I suppose that if it was a weekend warrior scenario like in the books and movies then it would make more sense but as a 24/7 married couple the idea is really silly (to me anyway).

I suppose if I was the type to get upset or whiny if I wasn’t getting attention you would know that I still wanted you very much even though I was never to start something. But I’m not that way … so if I never start and never whine and just basically let you have your way when you want and show no signs otherwise, wouldn’t you start to think after a while that I really wasn’t interested and the only reason I did was because you said so? Wouldn’t it be natural for you to eventually start losing interest or at least stop trying? (Pretty sure I’ve heard of this scenario once or twice!)

So …. I’ve written it down, that always helps to get it out of my head! We’ve discussed it, this is what you want. You like having me all over you and you like having the power to say yes or no. This is our dynamic and what everyone else thinks or does is their’s to own, this is ours.

My self help project for the New Year! lol  Love You Always   ❤

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