To me being or staying submissive is a perpetual work in progress. I have been practising for many years and have found a few simple but effective ways of really working on remaining submissive.
I find a lot of similarities between things that help me remain submissive and things that help me remain happy in general with life:
- Don’t sweat the small stuff
I know you have heard it many times, but have you really put it into practice? And what is the small stuff anyway? Well if it’s not detrimental to your physical or emotional well being then it is probably part of the small stuff. So think, is it really worth getting yourself worked up about? At the end of the day is it really going to change your life so drastically? If not then let it go …
- Be honest. with yourself and others
A little tough love guys! Is this thing you are worried about really what you say it is? Is someone trying to upset you or make you feel bad or are you just taking it that way? Have you taken the time to figure out what it is you want and communicated it to the other person, or are you expecting them to read your mind and fix ‘it’ for you in some fictional ‘knight in shining armour’ scenario.
- Be Kind
It takes much more strength and makes you look much better to be a kind generous person then to be hurtful and cruel. You might think that venting your anger is just what you need at that moment but it always makes you feel worse about either yourself or the situation, and normally both. And if you follow the previous two ideas you might find yourself less and less angry/upset all the time.
My experience has long been that most worries and stresses are self imposed from keeping up with the Jones’ and having to put forth a certain standard to thinking you haven’t met someone else’s expectations. The truth is most people don’t notice you enough or put enough importance in what you are doing to really care.
Whatever they did or didn’t do almost always has nothing to do with you personally, so don’t take it as such. If they are truly trying to get to you well, why are you letting them? You choose who you listen to and who you don’t, so take responsibility for yourself here.
If the person you’re taking about is your loved one then they probably didn’t do it (whatever it is that you have chosen to stress about or get upset about) on purpose. So communicate with them in a calm manner and see what happens. But again, be honest with yourself, you need to know at the very least what the real issue is and preferably what you need in order to fix it before they can even start to help you. Like I said earlier, they can’t read your mind.
All of these things have kept me in a happy, even mind set which makes remaining submissive so much easier. If anything does happen then the open honest self reflection and communication helps fix it quickly. Yes it is work but anything worth having is worth the work.
Looking forward to your thoughts Sir! ❤